Wednesday, November 30, 2005

UPS Deliveries

I ordered a printer recently. The UPS man just came by to deliver it. I, unfortunately, was still in my PJs. ( I work at home these days.)

The doorbell rang and I gave a yell of "oh shit!". Nevermind the tracking # HP gave me says that the package will arrive tomorrow.

I scrambled to get into my clothes. My DAMN FUCKING bra would not clasp. It claspes when I am not in a hurry but wouldn't fucking clasp now. Had to drag the clasps around the front to work them. I pulled on a shirt and jeans and ran madly to the door.

There was a little sticker on the window informing me of the next drop-off. The UPS guy was pulling down the street. I ran out waving my arms; note I did not have shoes on and it is raining. I see the brown van turn the corner. My heart sank. Then he backed up. He'd seen me!!!

Alas, no. He backs up, and then I wait for him to turn back down the street. Nothing. I figure he is making another delivery. He has backed up into a dead end and will turn back down my street as soon as he completes his mission. I'll catch him when he does.

So I wait under the overhang outside my home.

And I wait.

Eventually my ears pick up the sound of a truck being started. I tense wth excitement.

The truck passes down the other street.


Tuesday, November 29, 2005

Conversations with Retail Sales: Dooming Walmart

I went to the Body Shop yesterday as I was out of moisturizer and my skin is flaking already from the cold. Do you know that when I was in Atlanta I had oily skin? Now I need moisturizer. Aggggghhhh. Dammit WINTER.

Oh well. While in the store the sales assistant and I started talking about the after Thanksgiving shopping hell and the internet. More people could shop the internet as opposed to risking their neck or someone's to buy Aunt Essie a scarf. Or maybe shop at local boutiques.

This might seem odd for the sales lady to be saying because the store I was in was at the mall. Hey, retail people are human too. The retail consumers are the ones that are not human. You try working retail. Try working retail during a holiday. Trust me. Working retail and becoming disgusted with the general consumer was enough for me to vow to never again work in a job where I had to deal with Joe Shmoe at the ripe old age of twenty one. If I did I knew I would hate the world at large if I continued to deal with people wearing their worst face; the consumer.

The conversation changed and the sales lady mentioned Wal-Mart. She tried really hard, honest she did, not to make a face. She just couldn't pull it off. I told her not to worry. I hate Wal-Mart. I refuse to shop there.

I have many friends that refuse to shop at Wal-Mart. My friends have very good social - political reasons for not going in that store. I agree with their reasons. You probably know these reasons. I'll not reiterate. If you don't know, then check out: or my favorite .
Then watch .

All these reasons are sound and are cause to choose carefully where you shop. However, my reasons not shop at Wal-Mart are aesthetic. The stores are dirty, not well lighted, and completely disorganized. Nothing is intuitive about shopping in Wal-Mart. You will never be able to find anything in this store. (If you can find stuff in there, you've shopped there too much.) There is a science to laying out a store. Wal-Mart chose a layout that is conducive to Wal-Mart not the consumer.

That's my point really; the reason I don't shop at Wal-Mart. Wal-Mart treats people like consumers not customers. Wal-Mart forgets that one of the tenets of business is customer loyalty, gained by numerous factors that include customer service. Low prices only guarantee loyalty when someone else cannot meet your price. (Now go check out the sites above) Why should I shop at a place that does not care about my business? Exactly, I shouldn't.

Well, the sales associate whom I was speaking with gave me a scary tidbit of news. Wal-Mart is planning to open a bank.

Slapping my hand to my forehead...

Sunday, November 27, 2005

Thanksgiving, Kristna, and Harry Potter

For me Thanksgiving dinner is all about casseroles. No, I'm not a vegetarian. I just love the casseroles. I know this is not what Thanksgiving means, but I look forward to the green bean casserole, the sweet potato soufflé, and whatever other veggies can be combined in some magical, maybe not so healthy, concoction to be served at this stuff yourself silly meal. This year especially I was looking forward to the comfort food meal of all meals.

In the effort to get healthy and lose weight, my mom joined a group that taught her what it means to become a vegan. My mom encourages me to say that she is not a vegetarian because she is not sure that she will maintain it, but my mom is certainly sticking by it so far.

This Thanksgiving the magical casserole was vegetarian chili and whole wheat cornbread, mashed sweet potatoes with orange juice (do not attempt this at home), and raspberries for dessert. I stuck to the chili and the dessert which were delicious.

Mom and I spent Thanksgiving quietly. Called relatives and wished them happy. It snowed making being in front of a fire with spiced cider comforting. We thought about getting up and facing the mad shoppers on Friday (the mall in Maine opened at 1:00 am), but being the lazy ,we like sleep sort and have never gotten up that early to shop, we missed the saving insanity.

We did go out to see the Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire movie Friday night as both mom and I are fans. Recommend this one.

Came home on Sunday to see the lighting of the Christmas tree in Newburyport's, my small city by the sea, downtown. It was a grand occasion and a first for me in Mass. I always miss it because of extreme forgetfulness. This year I happened to see the crowd and was reminded.

My town's lightening of the tree is a not the hoopla that marked the past lightings in Atlanta I've been to. One year my friends and I went and watched the final lighting of the tree at Rich's. The tree would be lighted elsewhere after that 1991 Thanksgiving. We watched the lighting and then danced in the streets with the Harry Kristnas. That's a Thanksgiving weekend I'll never forget.

Newburyport does the lighting a little differently. Santa comes into town by boat and then is paraded around town in his sled. He meets up with various charchters. This year Snoopy, Peekachu, Felix the Cat, and Minnie Mouse met Santa in the town square. An odd assortment of friends to be sure. They rally the crowd of about 200 into Christmas carols and then the tree lights.

Not the Kristna Thanksgiving but a nice one.

Friday, November 18, 2005

Sex Epidemic

Today the news at 11:00 p.m. will air a story about all the people in the world that have on-line sex. My God, on-line sex is a freakin epidemic. Who knew?

This news story will teach you to recognize the signs. This newscast will teach viewers how to catch and prevent this phenom.

My god -- the horror of it all...


Must not laugh, but it's just too hard not to.

Got to love the local news.

Cookie Dough Hell

Today has been a bad day; the bad day from hell. A cookie dough day. The day where cookie dough is all you should /need to eat. I am an emotional eater. And the last two weeks have been a doozy. Doozy meaning everything came at me that could come at me. EVERYTHING. Personal, professional, emotional. God Damn weeks.

The final straw was my prescriptions. (Yes I know I sound old or geeky, but I am the one who has to live with the pills since I was a kid.) I went to get asthma meds today and the weenie heads gave me a prescription that I did not ask for. An older one that apparently took the place of the med that I needed and asked for.

I threw a tantrum. Threw a shoe against a wall in my home. Actually it was both shoes. Felt good. Haven't thrown anything in 10 years much less had a tantrum and become the whiny bitch of a mess witnessed by me today.

Too many bad events have taken place consecutively, thank God not concurrently, for anything as stupid as a wrong prescription to send me over the edge and right into cookie dough.

Feel the need to barf. Excuse me.

Tuesday, November 15, 2005

Amerikan Passport by Reed Paget

An independent film, released in 1999 with commentary overlaid in 2001, Amerikan Passport takes the viewer around the world with Paget through 1989-1991, where the world changed on all fronts; Tiananmen Square, re-unification of Germany, Gorbachev's perestroika and dissolution of the communist party, Iraq's invasion of Kuwait, the first Gulf War, El Salvador, the abolishment of South Africa's apartheid, etc...

The incredible reality in this documentary is accompanied by a surprising candid commentary from Paget that is lacking in most of today's journalists. Paget lets his subjects make his points. He laughs at the intolerance of the prejudiced by balancing the interviews with the eludidating intelligence of the people in the heart of change. He also laughs at himself.

Paget's travels take him to 20 different countries in one of the most politically charged times asking if the US is doing right or wrong in these countries, or sometimes Paget lets the camera simply watch the events taking place. The answers and observations might surprise viewers of this film.

I won't keep spinning this film in my own direction, but I will strongly urge people to watch it. If you can't catch it on the Independent Film Channel, try and order it. I warn you Netflix won't have this film.

Interview with Paget: